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Old 18-06-2019, 09:56 PM
lipe lipe is offline
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

A true friend is like a penis, he stands up for you in times of need. A genuine friend is like a bra, she supports you at all times. A faithful friend is like a condom , he protects you from all harm. A loving friend is like a vagina, she accomodates you fully despite the size of your problem.

⭕1. Kamasutra says : If you suck one nipple, the woman herself offers the other one. And that was the origin of "buy one get one free"!

⭕2. Did you ever notice: everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B". Blouse, Bra, Bikini, Boobs & lower body with a "P" Peticoat, panties, pussy... That's origin of "BP"!

⭕3. Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself. Moral: In life no one helps you once you're fucked.

⭕4. Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it.

⭕5. Life is like a dick, sometimes it becomes hard for no reason.

⭕6. Practical thought: A husband is supposed to make his wife's panties wet, not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband's dick hard, not his life..!

⭕When a lady is pregnant,
all her friends touch her stomach ad say "Congrats!".
But none of them come and touch the man's Penis and say "Well done!".
Moral: Hard work is never appreciated: Only results matter.