All you need to know about "Marriage/Divorce" under the SG Law

[Soul_Reaper]

Originally Posted by brtiios

The women's charter is quite strong over in spore. they are looking to amend the law by year end.

Try to put off ur divorce thoughts until they review the system.

Guys affected by the women's charter/maintenance/etc would know how biased the law really is.

Very true!

F * C K

T H E

W O M E N S

C H A R T E R ! !

[Sadguy2014]

Dear Brothers,

Pls help me find out best solution gain custody for kids and my asserts.

My story as follows:

I am married for 10 years and with 2 kids. One at 8 years(boy) and the other 10 years(gal)

On and off, my wife would have the usual quarrel. This time round I think she wants a divorce. She was chatting with a friend relatives in USA. They never met, but my wife have change totally. She so much wanted a divorce ASAP.
I owe a condo (just 2years) under my name and joint name with my wife for a 4 room HDB (8years)

If we have a divorce, what will be the best plan to gain custody for my 2 kids and property? All of us currently stay in the 10 years EC, we rent out the HDB. All the rental was kept by my wife. My salary was just enough to pay off my Condo loan and daily expenses.

I know my wife have out in effort to bring up the kids, It's just that I can't believe I loose out to a guy which she have not met in person before. I think this idea was brought up by the guy to leave me.

I also have little to blame like not helping out the house chores or neglect her, but we do still have set quite frequently until the appearance of the USA guy.

I hope brothers out there help me to think of a solution for my issue above.

If we divorce, will it be better to sold off the HDB 1st?
If I refuse to divorce, what will the situation become?

Thank you!

[99546]

Originally Posted by Sadguy2014

Dear Brothers,

Pls help me find out best solution gain custody for kids and my asserts.

My story as follows:

I am married for 10 years and with 2 kids. One at 8 years(boy) and the other 10 years(gal)

On and off, my wife would have the usual quarrel. This time round I think she wants a divorce. She was chatting with a friend relatives in USA. They never met, but my wife have change totally. She so much wanted a divorce ASAP.
I owe a condo (just 2years) under my name and joint name with my wife for a 4 room HDB (8years)

If we have a divorce, what will be the best plan to gain custody for my 2 kids and property? All of us currently stay in the 10 years EC, we rent out the HDB. All the rental was kept by my wife. My salary was just enough to pay off my Condo loan and daily expenses.

I know my wife have out in effort to bring up the kids, It's just that I can't believe I loose out to a guy which she have not met in person before. I think this idea was brought up by the guy to leave me.

I also have little to blame like not helping out the house chores or neglect her, but we do still have set quite frequently until the appearance of the USA guy.

I hope brothers out there help me to think of a solution for my issue above.

If we divorce, will it be better to sold off the HDB 1st?
If I refuse to divorce, what will the situation become?

Thank you!

Bro Sadguy2014,

If you and your wife still want the relationship.. Both of you can sit down and nicely talk, discuss and also think of your children feelings.. or look for a counsellor.. If really won't work out.. Then both of you can discuss about the share of the flat and maintenance. After that just only need 1 lawyer to help both of you to make divorce arrangement. Then employ 2 lawyers to fight the case.

About the hdb flat.. Is she the owner or occupier? If she the owner, she will get her share.. if she the occupier, did she pay any bills ( example: electrcity ) for the hdb flat before? If she got.. under as occupier, she will get her share more.. All is go by black and white.. if you have evidence.. you won't lose so much..

No matter how you fight.. always the woman win.. Don't do any decision when you in temper..

[deon]

Hi,
Me and my wife have been married for 14 years with 3 kids. Recently she wanted to divorce me becos of my temper. What I can say is there is no 3rd party involve. She even said that her heart is dead and there is no more feeling! I've tried everything I could to save our marriage but she just stands firm. Luckily our house still got left with 1 year 3 month before we can sell it. Any advice what can I do to save this marriage?
Thanks in advance.

[maleactor]

Hey Bro Big Sexy and anyone else who can help,

This is an excellent thread and I've learnt so much. However after reading the entire thread there are still some doubts I have regarding my own situation. I have been married for 4 years plus since 2011 and I have been thinking about divorce as I realise I still prefer a single life and my wife and I not really compatible. We don't have kids and bought a resale HDB flat in 2013. I had wanted to let her know at the end of this year however I was caught cheating in June this year (she hired PI and everything). What I'll like to clarify is:

1) Does adultery affect ancillary matters?

This is the most important question as it determines how I am going to proceed with the divorce. The divorce is likely to be uncontested, however for the sake of speed I may just ask her to file under adultery (she only has 6 months upon discovery = till the end of year 2014 to do it). I have read the thread and some bros have said that it actually affects the proceedings but some said it doesn't. What exactly does it affect? If it affects the ancillary matters then I'm going to wait it out till she cannot file for adultery then file under unreasonable behaviour or backdated seperation. So I need somebody who is cock-sure about this to enlighten me.

2) What determines adultery?

I know she has pictures of me holding hands and kissing the third party, but do not have actual evidence of us having sexual intercourse. Is she able to file under adultery based on those pictures? If she is able to, does it mean that as long as I do not deny the allegations it can be admitted as adultery?

3) I understand that whatever holdings we have after marriage is considered matrimonial assets. So is cash in personal accounts matrimonial or personal assets after marriage?

4) How do they determine the amount of contribution to our HDB flat when it comes to division of assets?

Do they only recognise CPF contributions? Or do they recognise my cash contribution as well? Eg, if she has put in 50k thru her CPF-OA and I have put in 50k thru CPF-OA and 50k thru cash, does that mean I have contributed only 50% to the flat or more than that? We are both self employed and have exhausted our OA so now have to pay cash. I am the one paying for everything including utilies, bills and the monthly installments. I am paying for the installments through our joint account (bank loan) through the loan servicing account, if I can show proof that the money from the joint account is from my personal savings account would they recognise that as my cash contribution?

[maleactor]

Still under moderation so can post short replies only

Continued...

6) If HDB tell me have to take back the flat I may then choose to apply for seperation and wait it out, till either she or me can take over the flat. During seperation are we allowed to date other people?

7) I'm an insurance manager running my own team of agents and currently she's one of them but doesn't need to do much sales. Means her income statement is less than 20k annually but I 'pay' her a cut of what we earn as part of helping me train my agents and doing my admin. My income statement is about 180k annually. Is this bad for me? Does this mean she can claim maintenance based on what I'm 'paying' her (average about $1500 monthly) every month? She spends what she earns because I take care of all expenses.

8) Should I then encourage her to go out and work and let her earn her own income? Since the affair she has been thinking about quitting my side here just in case we decide to spilt and she cannot tahan working with me anymore.

9) Should I also let her start to pay for some of the expenses so she's more 'independent' of me and thus have less of a claim for maintenance?

Appreciate all the kind advice!

[Grounded Eagle]

Originally Posted by maleactor

Still under moderation so can post short replies only

Continued...

6) If HDB tell me have to take back the flat I may then choose to apply for seperation and wait it out, till either she or me can take over the flat. During seperation are we allowed to date other people?

7) I'm an insurance manager running my own team of agents and currently she's one of them but doesn't need to do much sales. Means her income statement is less than 20k annually but I 'pay' her a cut of what we earn as part of helping me train my agents and doing my admin. My income statement is about 180k annually. Is this bad for me? Does this mean she can claim maintenance based on what I'm 'paying' her (average about $1500 monthly) every month? She spends what she earns because I take care of all expenses.

8) Should I then encourage her to go out and work and let her earn her own income? Since the affair she has been thinking about quitting my side here just in case we decide to spilt and she cannot tahan working with me anymore.

9) Should I also let her start to pay for some of the expenses so she's more 'independent' of me and thus have less of a claim for maintenance?

Appreciate all the kind advice!

Oh boy! ....... you are fucked!! Be nice to her and hope she wun get nasty during the divorce proceedings..... the WC is on her side.

[Ninja_Assassin]

Originally Posted by Grounded Eagle

Oh boy! ....... you are fucked!! Be nice to her and hope she wun get nasty during the divorce proceedings..... the WC is on her side.

F * C K

T H E

W O M E N S

C H A R T E R ! !

[The Milk Man]

Originally Posted by t00fd0ct0r

Same goes t0 all handling my case which is n0t even 0ne!

HARi MERDEKA!
"SBF °•○●♡ Di Sini Lahirnya Sebuah Cinta"



Married 1957 = 57yrs Family °•○●♡●○•° B0rnFree 1965. 49yrs NSf.
14 ☆.14 =. 1'C'. ●○•°♥°•○● 5☆. 2 =. 1'C'.

PS: R da 14-red-&-white-b0mbA-pipes in RM / $GD?

You are Malaysian?
Then the Women's Charter dun apply to you

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by The Milk Man

You are Malaysian?
Then the Women's Charter dun apply to you

Bro i dun think nationalities have any bearing on those fucking cock judges...as long as divorce file here, the Women Charter applies...

[maleactor]

Hey Bro Big Sexy and anyone else who can help,

This is an excellent thread and I've learnt so much. However after reading the entire thread there are still some doubts I have regarding my own situation. I have been married for 4 years plus since 2011 and I have been thinking about divorce as I realise I still prefer a single life and my wife and I not really compatible. We don't have kids and bought a resale HDB flat in 2013. I had wanted to let her know at the end of this year however I was caught cheating in June this year (she hired PI and everything). What I'll like to clarify is:


Anyone can help with above post? Appreciate whatever advice I can get.

[Xyberduke]

Originally Posted by maleactor

Hey Bro Big Sexy and anyone else who can help,

This is an excellent thread and I've learnt so much. However after reading the entire thread there are still some doubts I have regarding my own situation. I have been married for 4 years plus since 2011 and I have been thinking about divorce as I realise I still prefer a single life and my wife and I not really compatible. We don't have kids and bought a resale HDB flat in 2013. I had wanted to let her know at the end of this year however I was caught cheating in June this year (she hired PI and everything). What I'll like to clarify is:

1) Does adultery affect ancillary matters?

This is the most important question as it determines how I am going to proceed with the divorce. The divorce is likely to be uncontested, however for the sake of speed I may just ask her to file under adultery (she only has 6 months upon discovery = till the end of year 2014 to do it). I have read the thread and some bros have said that it actually affects the proceedings but some said it doesn't. What exactly does it affect? If it affects the ancillary matters then I'm going to wait it out till she cannot file for adultery then file under unreasonable behaviour or backdated seperation. So I need somebody who is cock-sure about this to enlighten me.

2) What determines adultery?

I know she has pictures of me holding hands and kissing the third party, but do not have actual evidence of us having sexual intercourse. Is she able to file under adultery based on those pictures? If she is able to, does it mean that as long as I do not deny the allegations it can be admitted as adultery?

3) I understand that whatever holdings we have after marriage is considered matrimonial assets. So is cash in personal accounts matrimonial or personal assets after marriage?

4) How do they determine the amount of contribution to our HDB flat when it comes to division of assets?

Do they only recognise CPF contributions? Or do they recognise my cash contribution as well? Eg, if she has put in 50k thru her CPF-OA and I have put in 50k thru CPF-OA and 50k thru cash, does that mean I have contributed only 50% to the flat or more than that? We are both self employed and have exhausted our OA so now have to pay cash. I am the one paying for everything including utilies, bills and the monthly installments. I am paying for the installments through our joint account (bank loan) through the loan servicing account, if I can show proof that the money from the joint account is from my personal savings account would they recognise that as my cash contribution?

1) Yes
2) Where did she get those photos? If they are by herself or from friends, not to worry.... If it was from a PI, start to worry... but can be argued easily by experienced divorce lawyers since these do not contribute to adultery.
3) The earlier.
4) Sorry bro, it starts from 50/50 regardless of contribution especially when it comes to HDB. The years of marriage will then increase the weightage on your wife's side as a normal practice.

[Xyberduke]

Originally Posted by maleactor

Still under moderation so can post short replies only

Continued...

6) If HDB tell me have to take back the flat I may then choose to apply for seperation and wait it out, till either she or me can take over the flat. During seperation are we allowed to date other people?

7) I'm an insurance manager running my own team of agents and currently she's one of them but doesn't need to do much sales. Means her income statement is less than 20k annually but I 'pay' her a cut of what we earn as part of helping me train my agents and doing my admin. My income statement is about 180k annually. Is this bad for me? Does this mean she can claim maintenance based on what I'm 'paying' her (average about $1500 monthly) every month? She spends what she earns because I take care of all expenses.

8) Should I then encourage her to go out and work and let her earn her own income? Since the affair she has been thinking about quitting my side here just in case we decide to spilt and she cannot tahan working with me anymore.

9) Should I also let her start to pay for some of the expenses so she's more 'independent' of me and thus have less of a claim for maintenance?

Appreciate all the kind advice!

6) Yes you may. You are separated. But if you want to save the marriage, now is the time.
7) You are mostly correct, but it is worst than you have described. Your employer-employee relationship with her attributes to the $1,500, but that has nothing to do with her maintenance and it may even be taken as a potential lost of income after divorce. You earn $180K and she has been following a lifestyle with household income of >$200K annually. Her lawyer will argue to maintain that with a percentage discount. Aggravated by her potential lost of earnings (depending on her educational level), I forsee the region of $5k/mth as asking price to be negotiated downwards...

8) & 9) Why ask? You are emotionally confused. It doesn't help and would only make things worst.

Do you want to save the marriage or not?
I have went through a divorce and I treasure my marriage today.
No matter how ugly your wife is, how poor your wife is, how unreasonable your wife is, you made the choice when you ROM. Because there is an element of love whether you admit it or not. We are men, and we easily fall in love in the other women.... that's men. The rest is how we control our emotions and leave those to one-night-stands, and sustain our marriage.

[maleactor]

Originally Posted by Xyberduke

1) Yes
2) Where did she get those photos? If they are by herself or from friends, not to worry.... If it was from a PI, start to worry... but can be argued easily by experienced divorce lawyers since these do not contribute to adultery.
3) The earlier.
4) Sorry bro, it starts from 50/50 regardless of contribution especially when it comes to HDB. The years of marriage will then increase the weightage on your wife's side as a normal practice.

Hi bro Xyberduke. Thank you so much for ur input. It's a lot of help.

1) able to elaborate a bit more about how adultery affects ancillary matters?
2) yes the pics are from a PI. got pics and videos of us together but not sexual intercourse. So I can deny if she files based on adultery ya? But if I choose not to contest is also considered adultery?
3) got it. Cash assets are considered matrimonial assets after marriage.
4) understood. Then I betta not pay cash for the house. Juz put money into my CPF and deduct from there for my home loan.

[maleactor]

Originally Posted by Xyberduke

6) Yes you may. You are separated. But if you want to save the marriage, now is the time.
7) You are mostly correct, but it is worst than you have described. Your employer-employee relationship with her attributes to the $1,500, but that has nothing to do with her maintenance and it may even be taken as a potential lost of income after divorce. You earn $180K and she has been following a lifestyle with household income of >$200K annually. Her lawyer will argue to maintain that with a percentage discount. Aggravated by her potential lost of earnings (depending on her educational level), I forsee the region of $5k/mth as asking price to be negotiated downwards...

8) & 9) Why ask? You are emotionally confused. It doesn't help and would only make things worst.

Do you want to save the marriage or not?
I have went through a divorce and I treasure my marriage today.
No matter how ugly your wife is, how poor your wife is, how unreasonable your wife is, you made the choice when you ROM. Because there is an element of love whether you admit it or not. We are men, and we easily fall in love in the other women.... that's men. The rest is how we control our emotions and leave those to one-night-stands, and sustain our marriage.

Continued...

6) oh I had the impression that until divorced finalised I must be a monk haha. As some of the previous posts said.

7) guess I'm fucked. I think I really get a Better picture of how maintenance works after ur explanation.

8/9 and ur last statement) thank you so much for your concern. I'm not emotionally confused. Maybe give u a bit more of my story. I regretted the marriage from the start. But she was too nice and I had no reason to break it off=I was a coward then. I have been wanting to leave this marriage a long time ago. But no courage to do so. The affair got nothing to do with it. It juz offered me a chance finally! U can say maybe I was glad I was caught. She is even willing to forgive me actually. Although she's really nice and good for me. I dun really love her that much. I see how some ppl love their wives or even gf so much. I'm jealous. Coz I dun feel the same way for her. I only continued and maintained the marriage to be responsible. But I also start to think I cannot live my whole life as a lie. So start to 'plan' for divorce. Hence these questions. Make her less dependent on me, let her earn her own keep. Den I not so shiong after divorce.

Anyways. How do I up u bro xyberduke? Newbie here