Wives and Lovers...Steps to Happiness or Unhappiness? - Page 4

BKnight · #46 02-04-2009, 10:38 AM

Bro Roncwk, Good post but err..............................please save yourself some trouble..please leave that kiko kid out of this, insects see the world very differently to us. Each eye of an insect is like a lot of eyes all stuck together, called compound eyes and insects also have good tympanal organs
to hear sounds, I bet now he should receive some signal and is rushing to the nearest toilet hole to transform into a Super Bug !!! You shall be his best friend from today onwards, get ready for PMs (read=many) you for streamboat, ktv, griefs till eternity...Thank you

ronckw · #47 02-04-2009, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BKnight

Bro Roncwk, Good post but err..............................please save yourself some trouble..please leave that kiko kid out of this, insects see the world very differently to us. Each eye of an insect is like a lot of eyes all stuck together, called compound eyes and insects also have good tympanal organs
to hear sounds, I bet now he should receive some signal and is rushing to the nearest toilet hole to transform into a Super Bug !!! You shall be his best friend from today onwards, get ready for PMs (read=many) you for streamboat, ktv, griefs till eternity...Thank you

Hahhaa...thanks for the warning....

Cheers dude.....

DO_YOU_BJ · #48 02-04-2009, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ronckw

Bro DYBJ....

Bro Kiko has a point to love our wives to a certain extent & i gotto give him credit to have a postive attitude towards marriage. Some ppl are just simply afraid of commitment.....

ronckw, its nottin wrong to be an idealist.
Wats wrong is the application of something you call SUTRA that you have no knowledge about.
Just like a single childless PRICK trying to teach you how to be a good daddy.....
I think you get my drift.
Till he gets married, like i said, if he could or if there's a female out there dumb or desperate enuff to marry this fella, then what he says will just be pollution to me.

Having a wife is no big deal.
Having lovers or mistresses is also no big deal
The moral of this post if you really read & understood it, is how do you manage it!

ronckw · #49 03-04-2009, 09:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DO_YOU_BJ

ronckw, its nottin wrong to be an idealist.
Wats wrong is the application of something you call SUTRA that you have no knowledge about.
Just like a single childless PRICK trying to teach you how to be a good daddy.....
I think you get my drift.
Till he gets married, like i said, if he could or if there's a female out there dumb or desperate enuff to marry this fella, then what he says will just be pollution to me.

Having a wife is no big deal.
Having lovers or mistresses is also no big deal
The moral of this post if you really read & understood it, is how do you manage it!

Bro... i understand where u coming from & really agree from the bottom of my heart.....

Its always easy for anyone to say something that they have not gone through....once they are there....totally different....

I guess i went off topic after reading ur conversation to Kiko....so sorry about that....

`TRISH · #50 12-04-2009, 07:13 PM

Its not how you manage it, is how you put your boundaries and principles above all. A bigger man put his own moral boundaries above his family.
It just shows how shallow you as an individual is.

`TRISH · #51 12-04-2009, 07:39 PM

Having an affair was once accepted and tolerated. It was once a social norm for a husband to support a wife and family, plus a lover.
True and not true. It still happens everywhere only thing is not so widely spoken about in the open like the good old days.
It is not spoken openly now is only because of the society had changed and women are treated with respect and they can survive without men providing for them. Now it IS a social norm for a wife to have a lover outside. Its only a matter of what your moral boundary is.

It is said that wives make fewer demands than mistresses! It is also said that they are insecure...which makes them peevish and selfish in their demands!
This statement must be very careful. An insecure wife means an insecure personality.....even if you're Jesus or Buddha, you marry such a woman, watever you do, they'll still feel insecure.
I so agree with this.

Mistresses don't see husbands at holiday times! But they are usually given more expensive gifts!
Mistresses......a very common term but also has many meanings.....
Types of mistresses:
1) The type that you BAO and keep to fuck
2) The type that is lazy to find her own money thus total submission to your needs to fill her stomach
3) They type that you meet after you get married and want to or wish she was your wife but you couldnt marry cos you already have a wife and kid
4) The type that is TRULY IN LOVE wif you and has no motive to destroy your current family and IS WILLING to be in second or 3rd place without any DEMANDS from you, other than keeping her company during your free time
5) Totally financially independent women who dun need a fucking cent from you but just wants your love and attention as & when you're available.

As for the expensive gift part, guess its a money transaction already to shut her fucking mouth, so dun really consider that as a mistress...more like a kept woman....this is how they differ from one another

Can a husband manage both a wife and a lover?
Of cos they can, its all in time management.........
Everything can be managed......just that many dun know how to that's all
Oh yes they can. Its all about time and being smart about it. You just gotta be smarter than your wife.

Are such relationships always doomed to fail?
Answer is NO! Again, depends on the diff distinctions of the kind of relationship that was mentioned above and what is their sole purpose to wanting to be with you in the 1st place.
If it was only due to money, then there was never a relationship to begin with, it was just pure Rental
If your talking about a real relationship then YES. It is doomed to fail. You know it before you even started it.

Is it worth having a secret lover?
Ah...this is a clear question.
Yes, of cos, Y not?
You can do things and fulfill your fantasies with your lover that you never even dare try on your wife....................
Also, if your wife makes you toolan, you got your lover to turn to.......
If lover make you toolan, return back to wife vice versa
Sadly, the way the above person see it, it only shows how shallow you as an individual is. If you think its worth having the risk of breaking your family apart by having a 'secret' lover then by all means. I believe in marriage the both should be open about their sexual intimacy and needs, and then compromise between. If you need someone to turn to, it just shows how depandent and insecure you are. If you think that way, I dont think you can sustain a marriage or even a relationship.

What do you think?

I think i answered you liaozzzzzzzz

[/QUOTE]

sneixd · #52 14-04-2009, 09:47 PM

`TRISH

I dont quite get it. DYBJ said clarity/transparency or honesty is the Key. And I very much agree to it. So where's the Secret Lover? There's none to begin with. Some people love ONE Car *maybe it's a bad analogy* but others just get more and in this case I park three in the same place and DYBJ has 4 under one roof. I cant comment anything about marriage though.. yet there's no disagreement here when all fit in / agree to fit in / under circumstance / or just fit in . . . . . they're in. Else, go park somewhere else.

One last point, we can share our needs analysis whatever but not every car drives like a conti. One is comfy, but no Oomph.. the other Power yet noisy. So, why cant I just keep a select few since my Dad and my fore-father(s) have been at it all along. Moreover, not every couple give in to each other's demands. E.g. my mixed-chinese sweet thing dont suck means dont suck.

And We Men Just Love Our KaRs =)
Each. Everyone of THEM.

DO_YOU_BJ · #53 14-04-2009, 10:11 PM

[QUOTE=`TRISH;3643143]Having an affair was once accepted and tolerated. It was once a social norm for a husband to support a wife and family, plus a lover.
It is not spoken openly now is only because of the society had changed and women are treated with respect and they can survive without men providing for them. Now it IS a social norm for a wife to have a lover outside. Its only a matter of what your moral boundary is.
Well said, but may i know where is this social norm acceptance is from?
I've really yet to hear or come across any to substantiate your claims......
I've really yet to come across any, no joke...but from this statement, you're definitely not from the MALE species

Can a husband manage both a wife and a lover?
Oh yes they can. Its all about time and being smart about it. You just gotta be smarter than your wife.
Remember the term lover, as explained earlier, and yes, to me a lover is nothing more than a piece of meat!

Are such relationships always doomed to fail?
If your talking about a real relationship then YES. It is doomed to fail. You know it before you even started it.
Again your statement twists from truth. You have to be very specific about wat you say...mistress or lover?

Is it worth having a secret lover?
Sadly, the way the above person see it, it only shows how shallow you as an individual is. If you think its worth having the risk of breaking your family apart by having a 'secret' lover then by all means. I believe in marriage the both should be open about their sexual intimacy and needs, and then compromise between. If you need someone to turn to, it just shows how depandent and insecure you are. If you think that way, I dont think you can sustain a marriage or even a relationship.
Oh dun worry, all my wives and me are very open. As a matter of fact, they were all laughing when they saw me replying to you.......do not pass judgment on what you have no idea of..........we have this openness that many people wont even dare to thread on!

My second wife just wanted me to add this, if you're a gal, you must have been betrayed big time before....poor thing...maybe if you're real lucky, you'll meet a man like my old man one day.
If you're a guy, well, you must be living in LALA land.

As for me, 2 posts only and this is all you can come up wif??????
Another Kiko clone??????bwahahahahaha

colins · #54 14-04-2009, 10:49 PM

It goes beyond the running of a family, it is the belief of how matters can progress from problems to solutions. Bro 'TRISH likes consultative, sitting on the fence type of approach. Like everything can chum xiong if love is good. But no room for anybody to catch a breath outside the relationship, not allowed cos moral doesn't allow it. So must solve things swee swee between 2 persons and things will always be resolved before the night is over and then sex will be good.

Reality is, one side will always compromise. You or your wife/GF. And the solution will always slant towards one end, unless of cos, you totally bochap and let someone run your life, trust me you will want to be the HEAVIER end. I have not seen a couple who would take a piece of paper and say, Ok ah I compromise 15 times liao and so far you only 2 times, now you owe me 13 times so you must listen to me for the next 13 times on my say to dictate our lives and YOU MUST BE HAPPY DOING SO. Let's have sex to seal the pact and you can suck my dick till I cum but I'll count that as 3 x compromise.

I think that's pretty deeeeeep my friend. Of cos if you really do that.

`TRISH · #55 14-04-2009, 11:07 PM

[QUOTE=DO_YOU_BJ;3649519]

Quote:

Originally Posted by `TRISH

Having an affair was once accepted and tolerated. It was once a social norm for a husband to support a wife and family, plus a lover.
It is not spoken openly now is only because of the society had changed and women are treated with respect and they can survive without men providing for them. Now it IS a social norm for a wife to have a lover outside. Its only a matter of what your moral boundary is.
Well said, but may i know where is this social norm acceptance is from?
I've really yet to hear or come across any to substantiate your claims......
I've really yet to come across any, no joke...but from this statement, you're definitely not from the MALE species
Okay, i had misused my words carelessly.
To be exact, it is becoming a social norm, 22% male and 14% female have at least once affairs in their marriage life. What makes you think the ratio wont waver?

Can a husband manage both a wife and a lover?
Oh yes they can. Its all about time and being smart about it. You just gotta be smarter than your wife.
Remember the term lover, as explained earlier, and yes, to me a lover is nothing more than a piece of meat!

Are such relationships always doomed to fail?
If your talking about a real relationship then YES. It is doomed to fail. You know it before you even started it.
Again your statement twists from truth. You have to be very specific about wat you say...mistress or lover?
I stated real relationship up there that involves emotions not just your piece of meat.

Is it worth having a secret lover?
Sadly, the way the above person see it, it only shows how shallow you as an individual is. If you think its worth having the risk of breaking your family apart by having a 'secret' lover then by all means. I believe in marriage the both should be open about their sexual intimacy and needs, and then compromise between. If you need someone to turn to, it just shows how depandent and insecure you are. If you think that way, I dont think you can sustain a marriage or even a relationship.
Oh dun worry, all my wives and me are very open. As a matter of fact, they were all laughing when they saw me replying to you.......do not pass judgment on what you have no idea of..........we have this openness that many people wont even dare to thread on!

My second wife just wanted me to add this, if you're a gal, you must have been betrayed big time before....poor thing...maybe if you're real lucky, you'll meet a man like my old man one day.
If you're a guy, well, you must be living in LALA land.

As for me, 2 posts only and this is all you can come up wif??????
Another Kiko clone??????bwahahahahaha

Like you said, dont pass judgement on what you have no idea of, so by the way I was opposing to the idea means I have been betrayed? By the way I was oppsing to the idea means I am living in LALA land?
Do you think every human on earth thinks like the way you do?

Openness is a nice way of saying, its just a convenient way of justifying your actions.
No secrets between your family, good!
They accepted it, good for you!
Everyone in your family think its okay and its rightful of you then good good for you!
But I still absolutely dont get your post.
Do you even think that 90% of them have been open about their 'piece of meat'.
From what I see from most of the comments are just plain selfish.
And if you are really open, and your 'family' are really open, then why so defensive about what I have said?
And I definately have a different view from you here.

1302 · #56 14-04-2009, 11:26 PM

Pengyou, y u bother to reply to this Trish fella?
See oso noe this one is none other than the sour mental psycho Kefuso aka Titleist.
I followed all the other post he did on the FL Dome regarding the Xiao La prostitute
No need use blain,use kidney oso know its him ler
Eh Kefuso/Titleist,chicken go back belly sad ah?
Its ok,u like to b carrothead hor,give her 10k sure come back and let everybody fuck again one
U say u millionaire correct,so this amount to u shud be penuts la

`TRISH · #57 14-04-2009, 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by colins

It goes beyond the running of a family, it is the belief of how matters can progress from problems to solutions. Bro 'TRISH likes consultative, sitting on the fence type of approach. Like everything can chum xiong if love is good. But no room for anybody to catch a breath outside the relationship, not allowed cos moral doesn't allow it. So must solve things swee swee between 2 persons and things will always be resolved before the night is over and then sex will be good.

Reality is, one side will always compromise. You or your wife/GF. And the solution will always slant towards one end, unless of cos, you totally bochap and let someone run your life, trust me you will want to be the HEAVIER end. I have not seen a couple who would take a piece of paper and say, Ok ah I compromise 15 times liao and so far you only 2 times, now you owe me 13 times so you must listen to me for the next 13 times on my say to dictate our lives and YOU MUST BE HAPPY DOING SO. Let's have sex to seal the pact and you can suck my dick till I cum but I'll count that as 3 x compromise.

I think that's pretty deeeeeep my friend. Of cos if you really do that.

Come on who does that? "Reality is, one side will always compromise" how far are you from reality? You have not seen it doesnt mean the world only exist in your point of view.

Sure the dopamin rush with a new face. We all know it comes back to the original state of mind. Whats new?

I still think it is just a selfish reason.

ronckw · #58 15-04-2009, 02:53 PM

ok....now the topic has too many words in it for me to understand the discussion simply....

blur liao.....

Panamera · #59 15-04-2009, 03:45 PM

Sis Trish, can share your story unselfishly?

newbadass · #60 15-04-2009, 07:57 PM

There are some who think they have it all figured out, and there are some who accept that they still have plenty to learn (as with all things in life).

I stand by my oft-repeated statement: The only thing you need to understand about women is that they can never be understood. Women are not meant to be understood. They're meant to be appreciated.

It's OK to think you have figured out your own best approach to certain issues (in this case, marriage and lovers). Just don't be foolish enough to think that everyone should follow your example. Everyone has his own path to take. Following in another man's footsteps only leads you to another man's destiny.