You are correct to say that in By-ing, some degree of KC-ing always occurs, whether by design or unintentionally. However, since the act of BY-ing is a commercial transaction, the chances of the guy getting sucked into a trap laid by the gal is really slim.
KC-ing WLs/FLs leads to trouble 99% of the time. I have witnessed this with many of my buddies who are experienced cheongsters. The main problem is that after a while, they lose their rationality in the KC relationship and once that happens, they sink deeper and deeper into the hole that they have dug for themselves. Sad to say, it is always almost next to impossible to get them to snap out of their dreams. By the time they have woken up, they would have lost not only their money but their gals also.
I have seen and met many WLs/FLs who are very easily KCed. But if you were to think with your big head, you will see through their act immediately. In short, a gal who is easily KCed is just putting an act to get your money.
Successfully KC-ing a gal means different things to different people. For some, they believe they have successfully KC-ed a gal when she says that she loves him...and that happens when they meet the second time...
For others, they say that it is successful when the gals finally agrees to stop working and be with them full time. But the thing they always forget to mention is that they are paying the gals 10K/mth for that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragonkeep
Very wise passage above - deserves to be downloaded and framed up somewhere to remind the Big Head to dominate.
Trouble free BY/KC calls for iron restraint. Had enough of the excessive pipe dreams the gal eventually gets frm my 1st long term BY fm SG to PRC. Ended at the point she was talking making babies etc., but with a drama and attempted suicide. The current PRC baoee knows the score and accepts that I just have to tell her game over but dun lie to her ...
The $$$ loss is gonna be a given. No $elf re$pecting WL/FL/MM is gonna start even considering most of us uncles in SBF unless you've got the charm/looks of the fortunate few Adonis types here unless we fla$h enough Yusuf Ishaks at them. So a rather shrewd fellow cheongster measures the no. of fxxks vs the total investment and uses that as a gauge of how far to go.
Each time I take the lift up at TAM complex n spy the new stocks coming in, it reminds me with great enphasis that Bro TD's way leaves me free to hunt without obligations. However, sometimes when I knock off work late or have a sleepy pm to spend, having a gal on call is also great.
So, I've been balancing the local stock here by playing male "hard to get" or rather, "dangerous to get". I openly tell them I'm bloody 花心 and 不合格 to be their lao gong. One of the prettiest (to me ok, and beauty is subjective) I have (absolutely love her smile and face), spotted me in CI a few times where she trawls (did not BY her) ... one day she was even in the line up so picked her. Spent half an hour comforting her crooning romantic Chinese songs with her whilst she wet me bloody collar with tears. After that, she confessed she just needs to be "honged" a while n she would regain her composure and accept the reality. I can still get her as a FB or just for company on call ... but she knows I cannot be hers. The price: I help her every now and then on little things like her rent. There$ a price for everything ...
Bros
Such great forum from two expert seniors in the early days of 2011 and their discussions then were superb.
I really cannot disagree more.
KC game is a serious and hurting business. Those who lost thinking that they had won the kc game but instead been kced by the gals.
Agreed that by time woke up from the dream may have lost a fortune.
How I cannot believe these gals threatened to suicide and all these drama queens will win any awards for their crocodile tears.
I shall also never forget to pratcise what you preached. Never be a wussy.
No wonder chinese always believe must have backbone.
Cheerios.
Bro,
Tks for your post.
Women are attracted to men w/ emotional mastery n emotional strength.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 69minutes
Very true, should never be monopulated.
Thanks for a great thread bro WB.
Have a nice day
Bro, thanks.
We should never be 'monopulated.'
Quote:
Originally Posted by soonwah
Bro WB,
Thank you for the detailed SZ + CP trip field report. You made an interesting observation that there was quantity but quality was so-so.
I was surprised you also arranged sssyts to flew over to be with you too.
I think you dun feel good living in PRC because you mentioned previously you like to settle down in Xiamen.
i really agreed with you with this statement -
"IMHO, if a man is perceived to hv high ranking on the Male Dominance Scale n if he maintains excellent self mastery throughout the RS w/ a gal n at the same time gives her regular COS, she will be KC-ed. Period."
Really enjoyed all the discussions going on and the planning how to get gals be it in Singapore or anywhere else in this world.
Happy reading!!
Bro, tks.
I took that SZ and CP trip a long time ago, in March of 2011. I saw a huge number of SYTs but the quality was so-so. If I had stayed a full week and visited the joints every day, I probably could hv found more than a few gems.
I'm now looking for SYTs for BY who are not the type usually found in SZ and CP. Those girls are only for ST.
My SYT lao po must hv 气质. I can't find an English word to accurately describe it. Perhaps it means a girl is refined, educated, classy and poised? IMHO, girls from Jiangsu and Zhejiang are more likely to hv better 气质. A man who has this trait is also very attractive to a higher class of women. Birds of a feather flock together.
In my recent post, I wrote that: "Actually, I'm much more discerning and selective now in choosing a SYT. Her youthfulness, cuteness, looks, the right body and limbs proportions of my type are not enough. She must also hv the right character and personality. She should also be hardworking, intelligent and frugal."
I need to add 气质 as a very important attribute. Of my 3 current LPs, TY has lots of it, KT next n LS somewhat less.
Quote:
Originally Posted by soonwah
I am really interested to read the post below and I hv plenty to learn.
Quite agreed with bro on the young syts. Most syts are not good in bed and will not be able to do much foreplay because they lack of proper training and experiences. Need to be guided by sexperts like bro WB before the syts can be really good in bed.
I like to discuss horoscope and how this affect the r/s.
We are know chinese horoscope have 12 animals and born diff years.
If we count 18yo today then we are talking about syts who are born in 2000 birthday before Aug 2000.
Year 2000 was Dragon year and not suitable for Dogs.
Year 1999 was Rabbit and not suitable for Roosters
Year 1998 was Tiger and not suitable for Monkeys.
Many fortune-tellers will tell you base on your birth year, month, day, hours and if you are suitable to be with which syts. Well at least in my life, I will never get gals that offensive to my horoscope.
All these are predestined in life.
So if you could not get a certain syt then too bad there will always others coming to your life.
Cheers + happy reading!!
Hmm....if now you interested in the singer...then the gurus to discuss and seek strategies on will be BYBJ or LDH....although they are "retired", their experiences in this field are still top notched and spot on...as for handling young charges...I guess this fall under the purview of Bro WB...hahahaha....
Bro, tks so much.
Yeah, 18-19 yo SYTs usually give little sexual service. But they boost my immunity and may add years to my healthy life.
The two flower kings are bros DYBJ and LDH. Only they knew how to subdue these psychopathic gold diggers. It's not for the faint of heart. Like Al Capone said, you must use your heart less.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BishanMRT
I am interested to learn too. Seems like this is the thread for learning.
Cheerios and have a nice day.
Bro, tks.
..............................................
Good afternoon,
TY is probably one of the best quality SYTs of my type I ever had. In retrospect, it was TY who approached me. She came n sat next to me and pointing her legs in my direction. I didn't see her coming towards me at all. I suddenly found a chio SYT sitting next to me. And looking at me. She was very youthful and attractive and I immediately wanted to get to know her better. It was 9:28 PM on 9 March 2018.
BTW, I'm just a trainee in BY and I hv a long way to go. My dream is to become a master. I'll do whatever it takes.
It's very tough to become a master in getting the prettiest girls of your type. It takes lots of studying, observing, researching and practising. It's part science and part art. You need repetition and lots of hands-on experience to become 'unconsciously' competent. For example, don't read a good book once, read it 15-20 times. Most importantly, you must also have awesome emotional mastery and emotional strength. And you must believe you're great w/ women and you're the prize, not just consciously, but also subconsciously. Same w/ investing and trading or other worthy pursuits in life. It's 99% perspiration and 1% inspiration.
There are many naysayers who hv posted here. Some of them may be young n good looking and still hv to pay and pay AND still can't get the best quality girls of their type. So they think it's impossible for a lao chee ko pek to achieve it w/ ease. They sincerely believe it's all about money, big money. I can't blame them for that. But they are dead wrong.
They are 'unconsciously' incompetent, just like 99% of men.
They are frustrated and are failures w/ women mainly because their behaviour is needy n insecure. They may get angry or jealous easily. They hv very poor emotional mastery. Or perhaps the girls are psychopathic gold diggers and they are not wealthy enough. Or the girls are sapiosexual and they are not smart enough and not very well educated. A degree from a good uni is the minimum. A doctorate degree from a famous uni is much better. There are many other reasons. But it's not because of their looks and going for plastic surgery is just plain stupid.
To get THE best quality girls, a man must also have 气质. And other masculine traits of course.
IMHO, the second most attractive masculine trait is awesome emotional mastery and emotional strength.
Your comments are appreciated.
Cheers!
Bro WB
__________________
Minimum 8 points for exchange, effective 25/1/22. Thanks!
“知彼知己, 百战不殆。"
得失随缘，心无增减。活在当下， 分秒感恩。
I accept whatever is happening to me at this moment. I'm relaxed, self-assured, happy, thankful, and at peace NOW.
My SYT lao po must hv 气质. I can't find an English word to accurately describe it. Perhaps it means a girl is refined, educated, classy and poised? IMHO, girls from Jiangsu and Zhejiang are more likely to hv better 气质.
Cheers!
Bro WB
气质 Qìzhí = temperament
__________________
Welcome to exchange points! Please indicate your nick and have recent posts to return fast.
Minimum 5 points to exchange.
2nd rd - wally888, Rasta Marley, vampiredevil, arse-nal, hamsapkwai, sexscandalus, dc7176, kopigaogao,
hitman1891, Havana Slicks, prince devit, Shiofukis, bigbirdbird
Global markets hv taken a severe beating since the massive earth quake in Japan. I'm following Getty's advice "Buy when everyone else is selling...n hold on until everyone else is buying." But it's easier said than done.
In full-time BY-ing I expect my full-time GFs to always say YES, whenever I want to fxk them n whenever I want them to spend time w/ me. They also can't say NO whatever I want to do to them, within reasons of course. It's a given they can't fxk other men n can't go to work. In return, I allow them the freedom to make frens w/ anyone. However, they must tell me asap if n when they fall for some young men, hehehe.
BTW, while my other GFs r in China, my 1st BAO-ee XW's pussy was always available to me. I hv narrated my saga w/ her in the past. She is now 23 n a very different person. Although I BY-ed her twice in the past, I was unable to give her COS bcos she would push me away after she came once or twice (a common problem...). She used to give me minimal service, but she is now so fxking hungry n passionate!! She couldn't seem to get enuff...reaches COS in every session n she loves 69. Hv I improved that much? Her cunt is still as pretty n as tight as before. She said: "I'm getting old whereas u are still exactly the same. Many gals in my town r already married at my age..." I lost ctc w/ her in June last yr. She was kept by a SG man in his early 30s, who must be in some sort of "all cash business," for abt 6 months. He was very generous to her...but unfortunately he fell for her n proposed to her! Her parents strongly objected to the marriage n ordered her to go back home in Dec. She recently returned, changed her HP...hahaha, his loss is my gain.
Best,
Mr. Guru
[/SIZE]
Bro WB
Happy Sunday!!!
Looks like it is the same now with global markets declining and bear markets ruling. Recently have not read about your comment on the markets? So your investment doing well?
Are you still following Getty's advice? Buy when everyone is selling and hold on when everyone is buying?
Why should your baoee dun allow you to f**k unless she is having her monthly period or ill? I wonder too?
I recently received the following email from a guru:
Pleasure Panic: Why Some Women Say Stop
- Why women sometimes stop you or push you away
with their hips just when it looks like they are
about to orgasm...
***QUESTION***
Hey My name is [...], and when i'm fingering or
going down on my girlfriend sometimes she will
make me stop because the sensation is too strong for
her to handle. Does that mean she reached the
point of orgasm and is too sensitive to continue
going?
- D
>>>MY REPLY:
Maybe.
Some women do, in fact, get overly sensitized
after orgasm and find continued contact too much
to handle for a short while and need to take a
break. But this is uncommon.
More likely is that she is right on the edge of
orgasm and is unable to cross over to the other
side.
This kind of "pleasure panic" is incredibly
common. Orgasm, for many women, is a huge act of
surrender. She is not comfortable losing
control of herself that way.
Especially in front of you. But often women
can't do it alone either. They just PANIC when
they feel the rush of the oncoming orgasm.
(Often women can have shallow orgasms, but
when something monster big is coming, or when
they are already coming but feel a "stacked"
orgasm that will notch them up into a higher
level, they feel that sense of panic that they
just won't be able to handle it).
That's why so much of my book is about earning
her complete "Sexual Trust".
Once you do that, she will surrender herself
to you completely and you can gently guide her
across her fears to the other side-- and she will
have mind-blowing pleasure.
Learning to build Sexual Trust is the key to
most of the advanced sexual knowledge that you
will ever encounter...
Learning to hold space for her to experience
things she might not even be able to do alone,
and learning how to give her CERTAINTY that you'll
be strong and calm afterwards if she experiences
some wild emotions from it... these things can't
just be faked, and they are much more important
than some finger, tongue, or thrusting techniques.
And if you spend a little time working at it,
you will give her her very first orgasm. Which
is pretty cool.............................................. ........
The above post from guru makes sense although I have not encountered with my gal.
So this XW push you away when she was having big climax orgasm. Really couldn't imagine although my gal will be frustrated if i become flaccid before she come.
Thank you for all hard work and I have plenty to learn in your auspicious thread.
Looks like it is the same now with global markets declining and bear markets ruling. Recently have not read about your comment on the markets? So your investment doing well?
Are you still following Getty's advice? Buy when everyone is selling and hold on when everyone is buying?
Why should your baoee dun allow you to f**k unless she is having her monthly period or ill? I wonder too?
Thanks and cheers.
Bro WB, wish you do well in your investment.
Thanks for this wonderful thread, lots to learn from you.
The above post from guru makes sense although I have not encountered with my gal.
So this XW push you away when she was having big climax orgasm. Really couldn't imagine although my gal will be frustrated if i become flaccid before she come.
Thank you for all hard work and I have plenty to learn in your auspicious thread.
With a big field of opportunity to pick up gals also mean plenty of strategies and patience.
Your guru highlighted a very important point about common mistakes made by men. Man always like to tell the gal you like how you feel about her and that can be a turn off for the gal. If the gal is a best friend then maybe time to lose her after telling her how you feel about her.
Bro WB always emphasized self-mastery traits as the key to get gals. The guy who possessed the high level of self-mastery stand to gain.
Guy must always view himself as the ultimate PRIZE.
As for alpha male then the next post explain quite detail what alpha male is about.
Hope to comment more and pickup tips from here as I read on.
Bless bro WB and all reading here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by warbird
The key is to be a poker player n never reveal our feelings to these gals, at least not initially.
More advice on the subject from my favourite Ang Moh guru:
Have you ever made the mistake of
telling a woman how you felt about her?
It's a common mistake, and I'm going to
reveal why in this newsletter.
If you'd like to jump straight to the
information that can help you avoid this
kind of fatal mistake with a woman you
want to get in your life, go here
QUESTION FROM A READER:
I have a problem, quite a big one in my
opinion.
Well where shall I start, a few months
ago I met this girl at college, she's
smart, funny and I feel we connected.
We gradually became better friends and
we spend a lot of time together and over
the past few weeks I suspected that she
may have some feelings for me (I did
too).
Feeling quite confident about this
looking at the way she acted around me I
thought on New Years Eve I would try and
tell her how I felt and see if I was
right in thinking she felt the same way.
She's one of my best friends and I love
her, I'm so scared of losing her as a
friend, I just, for once in my life want
something more out of it.
Please... I really need some advice
from a expert like you.
Thanks a lot
Ash
West Yorkshire, Britain.
______________________
MR GURU ANSWERS:
Well, my friend, you came to the right
place.
First of all, you know where your
mistake was, don't you?
Let me replay your words:
"I took her into a quiet room and told
her how I felt..."
Guys everywhere are saying, "OOOH... Big
mistake" and shaking their heads.
Especially me.
The one sure-fire way to kill attraction
with a woman is to talk to her about
your feelings. It's the ultimate
buzz-kill.
Why?
Imagine that you're sitting there
watching a movie. It's a really good
mystery. You're keeping track of all the
clues, and you're getting close to the
end. Right then, your roommate walks in
and says, "Oh, the guy's wife killed
her." And he goes to the kitchen.
How would you feel?
Probably like stomping on his head.
We humans enjoy the build up of tension.
What ruins it for us is to have the
mystery destroyed.
That's why I hate this new show on cable
that shows you how all the magic tricks
are done. I don't want to know how
they're done... that's why I like
watching magic shows! I know they're
tricks, but I like not knowing.
This is exactly what your girl
experienced when you told her your
feelings. You probably thought she'd
just jump into your arms, relieved to
find out that she liked you, too. But
what telling her your feelings does is
remove all the mystery and uncertainty
from the situation...
And that's what creates attraction and
romantic interest in the first place, my
brother.
Second of all, I want you to promise me
that you never make a move on a woman
that you're "so scared" of losing.
Why?
Because you're setting yourself up in
what I lovingly call a "double bind."
This means that if you're scared of
losing her friendship, that fear will
taint any attempt you make to attract
her.
You simply can't have it both ways. You
can't walk the fence.
Fear of loss is one of the most deadly
killers of a man's game, because he will
never act like a man who is living his
life from ABUNDANCE and SECURITY.
Instead, he acts like he's a wuss that's
scared of making people angry at him.
Think about it for a second... Think
about any guy you know who is attractive
and charismatic. Does this guy run
around with a "Oh please oh please - I
hope you like me!" attitude?
No. He doesn't care if you like him or
not - and THAT right there is why we're
attracted to those types of people. They
communicate strength of spirit and
confidence that is not shaken by other
people's opinion of them.
Really, take a second here and read that
over again. It's big and important that
you understand this essential
characteristic of men and how they
communicate their Alpha Strength.
Third, if you do make a move on a woman
that's your friend, be willing to risk
LOSING IT ALL.
This is the other side of that fear I
just told you about. You have to be
willing to lose what you've got to get
something more.
Don't be lured into that false sense of
need where you try to play with "scared
money." That's when you're gambling, but
you change your winning strategy because
your emotions are jacking with your
decisions.
You said that this "destroyed you..."
No, I don't think so. You just lack
options.
From now on, no more emotional
discussions with her. Women don't need
to know that you are interested in her
or have feelings in her. All she cares
is if SHE has them for you.
You can talk about your feelings later
on, when you've got a relationship and
you two are having wild monkey-love
together. Until then, keep your mouth
closed.
Next, make damn sure you're out there
meeting new women and forgetting your
focus on this one woman. Obsession is
the number 2 killer of relationships,
and it's the unhealthy focus on ONE
woman.
It screams out: "I have no other options
but you, which means no other women want
me..." Which is a BIG red flag to women.
They want a man with social value and
confidence.
But I want to warn you about a problem I
see coming up...
I think you might be falling into the
Nice Guy trap.
You know how I can tell? From the tone
of your email at the end. It sounds like
you're sobbing into a hankie, and you
might go out and rent a bunch of chick
flicks tonight while you sit home eating
chocolates...
You need the antidote to cure you and
rehabilitate you, and it's called Alpha
Attitude.
What is "Alpha Attitude?"
Well, think of it this way:
It's the inner confidence of a man who
knows he can create the kind of
relationship he wants with a woman.
Have you ever seen an at-tractive woman
on the street, and thought to yourself,
"Man, I wish I knew what to walk over
and say to her so that she'd stop right
there and really want to know more about
ME."
But then we usually disqualify ourselves
in our head, thinking "What do I have
that she'd want?"
The Alpha Attitude wipes all that
self-doubt and fear away.
I explain the inner game mindset of the
man who is confident and has women in
his life all the time. I call him the
Alpha Man.
You know this guy. Chances are, you wish
you WERE this guy.
Being the kind of man that pulls women
into his life - and keeps them - isn't
hard at all. It just involves learning a
few new skills.
I want to give you that deep
understanding and ability with women
that you've always wanted. I have a full
set of tools and techniques that will
improve your game with women MASSIVELY.
And I want to share them with you. This
is stuff you can't get anywhere else.
Your BAO-ee with height 168 is rather tall for women. If with heels can scale 171 to 175. Wonder if you are so tall too.
Anyway back to alpha male and how gals always love them. Gals always want the top guy in the pride. Alpha male are seen as the strongest gene with top grade. In the ancient times, women often wanted to marry the Emperor and have their royal blood children. Similarly in the animal kingdom alpha male are the one to mate all the femaie.
Alpha male always deemed as the highest social value in the hiearchy. The alpha male may or may not be the funniest character and able to make teh group livelier.
Anyway I still have plenty to learn before I can even considered myself any social status.
Bless bro WB with all his lovely BAO-ees and enjoy yourself.
I hv been searching for mistresses on Chinese websites n hv found many chio SYTs, most of them non-WLs, who r willing n ready. Unfortunately, many of them r unwilling to come to SG, even though they r quite eager to be kept by me in Beijing or anywhere else in China.
I hv some reflections on my experience in BY-ing which I started exactly 2 yrs ago. My 1st BAO-ee was XW who had resisted my advances for over 8 months. My mistake? Being an ah pek, I thought I wasn't good enuff for her, a 20 yo SYT then. She left me twice...but she is back w/ me again. Now the table has turned. The reason? My attitude, or shall I say my subconscious mind, has changed radically. Now no gal is good enuff for me, regardless of how young n how chio she is. She can take it or leave it. Thanks largely to my meditation, self affirmations, self hypnosis n chanting, etc.
Now I hv a 老婆（XW ), 情妇（TC ), 女朋友 ( BB ) n 干女儿 ( CL )...n there r many more gals who hv agreed to be my BAO-ees, most of them in PRC. It may be coincidental that my current four gals r 168 in height. Fortuitously, the number 168 sounds like being very prosperous all the way down the road in Mandarin n Cantonese n some other dialects, hehehe.
I hv had more soul-searching dialogue w/ CL than w/ anyone else in my life. She is so much fun. Could she be my soul mate? She also has the smallest n tightest cunt, haha. She wants to be my lover for the next 10 yrs! My best fren has seen her photos n thinks she is definitely worth my effort. No, she is far from perfect: She has medium-sized bony frame n I hv failed to give her COS.
At this time, I like to share an email from a guru on the importance of high social value.
Hey,
Let's face it: women love guys with high status. They're suckers
for the alpha-male types that don't give a damn about what others
think of them. It's that "X-factor" that makes girls melt in their
seats and gets them all hot and bothered.
In PUA circles, players refer to this as social value, a commodity
worth GOLD in the field. It's this mysterious, seemingly
intangible quality that all AFCs strive to have, but end up
scratching their heads trying to chase after it.
But first, let's get a preliminary question out of the way...
WHY BOTHER WITH SOCIAL VALUE?
Well first of all, not having this is like going on a long drive
without passing by the gas station to fill up. In the same way,
going into the scene without a trace of status is pure SUICIDE.
Not only will you be stuck in uncharted territory, you'll be making
an ass of yourself in short order. You have to appreciate the fact
that humans, even during these modern times are still compelled, no
- HARDWIRED - to follow behavioral patterns encoded into our DNA
thousands of years ago.
In the olden times, women learned to align themselves with men who
are able protect and take care of them. If you couldn't hunt for
your daily meals or build that bonfire, then you're pretty much
useless.
Now, while those same exact traits might not apply to today's
standards, the same spirit of those desirable qualities lives on.
In present society, survival value have modern equivalents, such as
leading other guys, keeping bullies from beating up your brothers,
or being able to loan money to your broke friend.
In short, people may have evolved in many ways, but our underlying
social dynamics are still deeply rooted in the same logic that goes
way back. That simply means that women as a whole are driven to
seek men who are strong in some way, even if they aren't
necessarily looking for a long-term commitment.
As such, you damn well better have the social value that they want.
If not, you won't have a chance in winning over any of those
gorgeous women you seek to be with. You're off to the sidelines,
watching those high-value males sweep your dream girl off her feet.
But don't despair. Social value can be cultivated to your
advantage, so rest easy as I give you a run-through of the two most
effective ways to jumpstart your dating life.
#1: Lay off the validation
That's why experienced guys swear by a basic principle when it
comes to attracting women: don't kiss her ass.
Let's face it - while women can be wonderful creatures to be
around with, they have the equal potential for ego-beating if you
let them. This is especially true for high-value women who are
aware of their status.
They reassure themselves of their feminine power by making short
work of guys that try getting on their good side. These suckers
will do everything short of rolling over and playing dead.
It can get even worse for some who "reward" these clueless guys
with crumbs of attention and then ditching them afterwards.
Chances are, you've seen this happen - or heaven forbid - tried it
yourself. Here's a classic example...
Guy says hi to hot girl, guy buys her a drink, and they make some
petty chit-chat. Girl finishes her drink, politely excuses herself
and re-joins her friends to dissect her latest victim.
Let's not BS ourselves here. OF COURSE you like her, that's why
you're approaching her in the first place. But are you initiating
the interaction in a NEEDY or CREEPY way?
Once she knows that you're sucking up, it tells her that you're
selling yourself, and that gives her all the power in the world
over you.
A guy with social value never tries to prove his worth. In fact,
he knows that it's suicide to ask for her approval through drinks,
compliments and so on.
Look, you're more than welcome to do all that once she's fallen for
you, but dealing your best cards early on in the game will leave
you NO leverage to seal the deal.
#2: Playful, not pitiful!
That's why high-value guys hold back on the attention and
validation by reversing the traditional script. The usual pattern
is to prove yourself, so the smart PUA reverses this order.
How does this happen? They replace groveling with playful
flirting. When you flirt, you're telling them, "I'm here to have
fun and don't really care if you respond positively or not."
And you really shouldn't care. When you build up the interaction
into something you really have to succeed at, then it's important
to you.
When she senses that it's important to you, then you've already
blown the approach because you've just lowered your social value.
In fact, you can care so less to the point of making fun of her in
a seemingly off-hand (but not belittling) way. If you're in a club
and approach the girl who appears to be the most popular in the
area, say something like "What else do you have going aside from
your looks?"
Not only will you have her full attention, she'll unknowingly give
chase. You've now created an opportunity for a back and forth
exchange of verbal wordplay without lowering your social value.
So now she'll have to justify her own value by proving you wrong.
After all, you just demonstrated backbone by not placing importance
on the one iota of power she has over other guys.
Of course, the smart PUA won't take the bait and casually dismiss
her answers with a comment like, "Hmmm, really?", and then
launching into a prepared routine.
That's pretty damn cocky, right? You've just leveled the playing
field by subtly (well not really) convincing her to prove herself
to you, and not the other way around. She'll be thinking "Who does
this guy think he is? I'll show him."
Women absolutely LOVE it when a man can take her crap and give it
right back. That sense of cockiness keeps your dignity intact by
not having to use it as a bargaining chip in the game.
Be playful, but not insulting. Be feisty, but never play around
with the possibility of violence. The whole point is to get a
woman to play with you, not to crush her dignity or smack her
around.
Otherwise, mean-spirited insults or jokes about punching her will
raise that red flag and take you OUT of the game.
Get used to greeting everyone you run into throughout the day,
whether it's the guy who delivers your morning paper or the
striking receptionist at work. Work your way up by starting
conversations when the opportunity presents itself.
Try this for about a couple of weeks to numb you to the fear of
initiating a conversation. Once you're comfortable enough, you can
move to casually approaching women in particular.
One thing though - a good approach never seems premeditated nor
should it look like you're hovering about. Both of those things
are social value killers. The operative word here is "nonchalant",
and remember that when you're out on the field.
Don't think that you have to make her laugh or get her number right
then and there. All you need to do is to gradually learn how to
embed flirting in your conversations.
If you're thinking, "I HAVE to get this right!" you will have
already undermined your social worth and lead to failure.
Keep the play-by-play analysis on hold until AFTER the chit-chat is
done. Once the conversation is over, ask yourself:
"What should I have I said/done differently?"
"Did I convey enough social value?"
I know how paralyzing fear can be; however, the gradual process of
coming out of one's shell is a very effective strategy for shy guys
to meet women. Expect a lot of botched approaches so don't take it
personally as you learn from your mistakes.
Think of it as accumulating field experience which will
continuously refine and improve your game as you go along...............................
03-08-2018, 01:47 PM
t Similar Threads
