Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by SingViet

yea. that's what i told my wife too. next time her mum sick and has hospital bills to pay, she pay herself.

YEah ... since she not poor afterall ....

[SingViet]

Originally Posted by shysaint

YEah ... since she not poor afterall ....

Actually what happened to me is not uncommon at all. Many so called `poor' families actually has a lot of land passed down from their fore-fathers. The land in vietnam has appreciated a lot in recent years, not only those in the 2 main cities but also those in the province. For those in Hanoi and Ho Chi Minh City, quite a number of them are made USD Millionaires because of land parcels passed down to them by their fathers. I have known a few of such vietnamese who became USD millionaires within a short few years.

For those in the province, they aren't so bad also. A piece of land that cost just a few hundred USD ten years ago may have appreciated to more than 10K USD and they not only have 1 pieces, but many many pieces. Its just that they are unwilling to sell the land and want to pass down to their youngest son. YES, hear carefully, unlike the chinese that pass down most of their fortunes to oldest son, vietnamese pass most of their fortunes to their YOUNGEST SON, who has the duty to feed the parents till their death bed. As for daughters, they normally do not pass any of their fortunes to those daughters who have married foreigners as these daughters are deemed to have better lifes abroad.

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by SingViet

they normally do not pass any of their fortunes to those daughters who have married foreigners as these daughters are deemed to have better lifes abroad.

Nothing wrong with that mah ... married abroad means good life ????? what a strange assumption ....

If were me , i wil say that's it man .... no more sending $$$ back ....

Do our part but never get appreciated ... help them with 'face' but also not appreciated ...

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by SingViet

yea. that's what i told my wife too. next time her mum sick and has hospital bills to pay, she pay herself.

Yes...you think your wife will pay...

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Yes...you think your wife will pay...

His wife will pay USING BRo SingViet's $$$

[SingViet]

Originally Posted by shysaint

His wife will pay USING BRo SingViet's $$$

haha. maybe time to cancel her credit cards.

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by shysaint

His wife will pay USING BRo SingViet's $$$

That's what I dun understand Viet ger mentality...neglected and not recognised by mother but still want to pay her bills...sianz...

[SingViet]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

That's what I dun understand Viet ger mentality...neglected and not recognised by mother but still want to pay her bills...sianz...

That's why they have viet names like GON for girls and TAI for guys. GON marry TAI , then give birth to GON GON Tai Tai

[Honey Boon]

kena brain washed the moment they are born, we say what also no use

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

That's what I dun understand Viet ger mentality...neglected and not recognised by mother but still want to pay her bills...sianz...

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by Honey Boon

kena brain washed the moment they are born, we say what also no use

no lah ... the moment their parent got infused ... already past down thru their genes liao .... imagine 9 mths of direct infusion and probably confusion .... no need to brain wash also like that liao ...

[HT26]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

That's what I dun understand Viet ger mentality...neglected and not recognised by mother but still want to pay her bills...sianz...

Giving parents money wasn't just Vietnamese gals way of showing filial duty to their parents. I knew many youngters here giving monthly allowance to their parents and if you have not done so, May i remind you of the is a Maintenance of Parents Act.

While there was no such a law in Vietnam that requires Viet gals to do so, they did it for the following reasons:

1) Vietnamese women have higher traditional asian standard of filial piety and family bonding.
2) They often feel insecured living in the foreign land without family members and friends around who can help them when in need and they need to build the bridge back to their Vietnam family just in case.

You should encourage your partner to do this but within your mean and tell your kids about that, this is not only for your partner own good but it will benefit yourself when you get old in the later stage of life and expect some "Filial Duty" from your children.

You should spend less time here TCSS and more with your life partners, love here, try to understand her, make her feel less "insecured", make your mother, father, your sisters, brothers to accept her as part of your extended family..

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by HT26

Giving parents money wasn't just Vietnamese gals way of showing filial duty to their parents. I knew many youngters here giving monthly allowance to their parents and if you have not done so, May i remind you of the is a Maintenance of Parents Act.

While there was no such a law in Vietnam that requires Viet gals to do so, they did it for the following reasons:

1) Vietnamese women have higher traditional asian standard of filial piety and family bonding.
2) They often feel insecured living in the foreign land without family members and friends around who can help them when in need and they need to build the bridge back to their Vietnam family just in case.

hahaha...omg....what is new...got a great reply...this shows you aren't following what my point was...oso showed you have a long way to understand vietnamese culture....btw, may I ask how long you have been travelling to Vn and how often you go...

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by HT26

Giving parents money wasn't just Vietnamese gals way of showing filial duty to their parents. I knew many youngters here giving monthly allowance to their parents and if you have not done so, May i remind you of the is a Maintenance of Parents Act.

While there was no such a law in Vietnam that requires Viet gals to do so, they did it for the following reasons:

1) Vietnamese women have higher traditional asian standard of filial piety and family bonding.
2) They often feel insecured living in the foreign land without family members and friends around who can help them when in need and they need to build the bridge back to their Vietnam family just in case.

You should encourage your partner to do this but within your mean and tell your kids about that, this is not only for your partner own good but it will benefit yourself when you get old in the later stage of life and expect some "Filial Duty" from your children.

You should spend less time here TCSS and more with your life partners, love here, try to understand her, make her feel less "insecured", make your mother, father, your sisters, brothers to accept her as part of your extended family..

Bro ...

1st ... I must say ur points are valid and I do agree to a certain extend ....

Yes , it's definitely a virtue to do that .... but .....

I think you do not understand the context we are sharing here .... and you jump into it and ask us not to TCSS ....

We are not here to say that this is wrong or that is correct ....

we are actually sharing what is happening around us where we have WIFE / GF ... we are sharing the cultures ... we are sharing the behavioural patterns ....

PLease do not apply our cultures wholesale into the discussion .... different society have different cultures ....

Based on what you are talking, I think you come to the wrong thread, you should go to Understanding Singapore Life Partner .... not here ... u are trying to infuse Singapore cultures into the Vietnamese Cultures ...

FYI .. all of use here accepted our partners, familly or even extended family ... we truly respect the cultures and infact most of the BROs have infused and have adapted into the cultures otherwise, we won't marry there, stationed there and start a family there ... and because we are there and been thru the journey, we share so that new BROs into the scene can decide for themselves if they want to get into the scene becasue it's long term ....

However, not necessary that the cultures are good, therefore we slowly influence each other and slowy inculcate good values for future ....

Do not comment for the sake of commenting just after reading a few post ....

Let me ask you ....

1. Have you ever been to Vietnam ??? If Yes, how long?

2. Are you already into the Viet scene ??? (Dun tell us you clubbed in JC or GL Viet joints )

3. How much do you understand about Viet Cultures to compares it to ours?

I dare to challenge all the BROs here ... your posting will receive many negative feedback ... reason ??? it's not for me to comment .... you find out soon ...

[SingViet]

Giving parents money wasn't just Vietnamese gals way of showing filial duty to their parents. I knew many youngters here giving monthly allowance to their parents and if you have not done so, May i remind you of the is a Maintenance of Parents Act.

While there was no such a law in Vietnam that requires Viet gals to do so, they did it for the following reasons:

1) Vietnamese women have higher traditional asian standard of filial piety and family bonding.
yes, you are right to say that giving monthly allowances to parents is a part of filial piety. but excessive giving in to the parent's demands and feeding lazy siblings is surely not an asian culture.

2) They often feel insecured living in the foreign land without family members and friends around who can help them when in need and they need to build the bridge back to their Vietnam family just in case.
so how do you explain the annual 8 billion USD of remittance by overseas vietnamese to vietnam? they remitted so much because they feel super insecure overseas? if you do have experience, their family members will only help when you have money, when you're down n out n back in vn, no one wants you too. bridges built will be broken and crash


You should encourage your partner to do this but within your mean and tell your kids about that, this is not only for your partner own good but it will benefit yourself when you get old in the later stage of life and expect some "Filial Duty" from your children.

we all do explain to our viet partners about doing it within our means. but the family members back in vn does not understand. they think overseas means $$$

You should spend less time here TCSS and more with your life partners, love here, try to understand her, make her feel less "insecured", make your mother, father, your sisters, brothers to accept her as part of your extended family.

my wife is well accepted by my family members. does it bother you that i TCSS here? for all i know, i spend good quality time with my spouse n kids.

[Seletar]

TCSS here is actually good because we can learn from the seniors about Viet culture and tradition. You will never satisfy her family, better let them work harder and you support a little.