Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[USDollarKiamGan]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Today's 'medication' in the series 'Laughter is the best medicine'.
👇👇

There was once a sheep farmer who needed help with the difficult task of castrating some of his inferior male sheep to keep them from breeding with the females.

He hired a French guy who didn't speak English, but was a very good worker.

After the first day, they had successfully castrated 14 sheep and his French worker was just about to throw away the 'parts', but the sheep farmer yelled, "No ! Don't throw those away!

My wife fries them up and we eat them.
They're delicious and we call them 'sheep fries'."

Later that day, the French hired hand came in for supper and indeed, the 'sheep fries' were tasty.

The next day, they castrated 16 sheep, and the following evening they all settled down to another supper of 'sheep fries'.

The third day, however, when the sheep farmer came home, he asked his wife where the French hired hand was.

She said, "You know, it was the weirdest thing !
I told him since there weren't very many 'sheep fries' this evening, we were also going to have French fries.

Then he screamed and ran like hell."

Nice and funny joke.
Hope can share more bro!

[sufferage]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Today's 'medication' in the series 'Laughter is the best medicine'.
👇👇

There was once a sheep farmer who needed help with the difficult task of castrating some of his inferior male sheep to keep them from breeding with the females.

He hired a French guy who didn't speak English, but was a very good worker.

After the first day, they had successfully castrated 14 sheep and his French worker was just about to throw away the 'parts', but the sheep farmer yelled, "No ! Don't throw those away!

My wife fries them up and we eat them.
They're delicious and we call them 'sheep fries'."

Later that day, the French hired hand came in for supper and indeed, the 'sheep fries' were tasty.

The next day, they castrated 16 sheep, and the following evening they all settled down to another supper of 'sheep fries'.

The third day, however, when the sheep farmer came home, he asked his wife where the French hired hand was.

She said, "You know, it was the weirdest thing !
I told him since there weren't very many 'sheep fries' this evening, we were also going to have French fries.

Then he screamed and ran like hell."

So nice and funny joke!

[galaxynotes10]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Weekend laughter...

Thanks for sharing bro!

[USDollarKiamGan]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Today's 'medication' in the series 'Laughter is the best medicine'.

Thid is damn funny hehe

[AMDfries]

Excellent thread, thanks everyone!!

[Hurricane88]

😅😂 Congratulations !!

Four husbands were sitting at the waiting room in a hospital while waiting for their wives giving birth. A nurse came out and told to the first daddy, "Congratulations, you got twins!".

"Oohh.. maybe its a coincident" said the daddy.

"I am working in Petronas Twin Towers".

Then another nurse came out and told to the second daddy,

"Congratulations! You have triplets!"

"Wooow!, this is a coincidence too" said the second daddy. "I am working for 3M Corporation"

Another nurse came out and told the third daddy, "Congratulations! Your wife got quadriplets!"

"Thank God! Maybe this is also a coincidence."

"I work in the Four Seasons Hotel!"

The fourth daddy-to-be was very worried. All the 3 daddies asked him, "Why are you so worried??

He answered, "I am working in Seven-Eleven ...!" 😅🤣😅🤣

[finch69]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

😅😂 Congratulations !!

Four husbands were sitting at the waiting room in a hospital while waiting for their wives giving birth. A nurse came out and told to the first daddy, "Congratulations, you got twins!".

"Oohh.. maybe its a coincident" said the daddy.

hahahaha. If I am him also worried.
Thank you for nice joke.

[kari]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

😅😂 Congratulations !!

Four husbands were sitting at the waiting room in a hospital while waiting for their wives giving birth. A nurse came out and told to the first daddy, "Congratulations, you got twins!".

"Oohh.. maybe its a coincident" said the daddy.

"I am working in Petronas Twin Towers".

Then another nurse came out and told to the second daddy,

"Congratulations! You have triplets!"

"Wooow!, this is a coincidence too" said the second daddy. "I am working for 3M Corporation"

Another nurse came out and told the third daddy, "Congratulations! Your wife got quadriplets!"

"Thank God! Maybe this is also a coincidence."

"I work in the Four Seasons Hotel!"

The fourth daddy-to-be was very worried. All the 3 daddies asked him, "Why are you so worried??

He answered, "I am working in Seven-Eleven ...!" 😅🤣😅🤣

Damn jiak lat, I also work in 24hrs store.

[garote]

Originally Posted by kari

Damn jiak lat, I also work in 24hrs store.

Originally Posted by finch69

hahahaha. If I am him also worried.
Thank you for nice joke.

no joke to look after triplets or more babies.

[UOBteller]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

😅😂 Congratulations !!

Four husbands were sitting at the waiting room in a hospital while waiting for their wives giving birth. A nurse came out and told to the first daddy, "Congratulations, you got twins!".

Hahahaha so funny.
Thanks for sharing nice joke.

[KelvinFiend]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

😅😂 Congratulations !!

Four husbands were sitting at the waiting room in a hospital while waiting for their wives giving birth. A nurse came out and told to the first daddy, "Congratulations, you got twins!".

"Oohh.. maybe its a coincident" said the daddy.

"I am working in Petronas Twin Towers".

Then another nurse came out and told to the second daddy,

"Congratulations! You have triplets!"

"Wooow!, this is a coincidence too" said the second daddy. "I am working for 3M Corporation"

Another nurse came out and told the third daddy, "Congratulations! Your wife got quadriplets!"

"Thank God! Maybe this is also a coincidence."

"I work in the Four Seasons Hotel!"

The fourth daddy-to-be was very worried. All the 3 daddies asked him, "Why are you so worried??

He answered, "I am working in Seven-Eleven ...!" 😅🤣😅🤣

Siao liao, I work in Taipei101

[AngelNguyen]

Originally Posted by KelvinFiend

Siao liao, I work in Taipei101

OMG! all the best to you bro

[Hurricane88]

😇Munusamy was baptized.

The pastor dipped his head into water 3 times and said you are now baptized.

Your sins are forgiven, you are a new creation in Christ, your name is now Jacob.

No more drinking of alcohol.

Jacob went home and goes to his refrigerator, took all his alcohol bottles out, dipped them into water 3 times and said you're baptized, your sins are forgiven, you're a new creation in Christ, your name is now Fruit Juice.

Don't laugh alone 😂😂

[bigbirdbird]

Skirts And Shoes

One day this woman who hated wearing underwear decided to go shopping for a new pair of shoes, and since she was wearing a skirt, the salesman was enjoying and excellent view.

After the third pair of shoes, the guy couldn’t stand it anymore. “Lady,” he said, “that’s some beautiful sight. I could eat that pussy full of ice cream.”

Disgusted the woman ran out of the store and went home. When her husband got home she told him about the incident and asked him to go beat the shit out of the salesman.

And when he flatly refused, she wanted to know why.

“Three reasons,” said her husband. “Number one: you shouldn’t have been out in a skirt with no underpants. Number two: you have too many shoes to last you for years. And number three: any son of a bitch who can eat that much ice cream I don’t want to mess with in the first place.”

[bigbirdbird]

Little Johnny and Suzy have nothing to do one day while in the house playing. All of a sudden, Johnny gets this great idea. "Let's take turns sliding down the banister rail!" he suggests.

"Oh no," answers Suzy, "That is way too scary."

"No, it is not," says Johnny, "it will be fun!" He proceeds to the top of the stairs. The banister rail is long and very smooth with a beautiful big marble ball at its base. Johnny climbs on and down he goes, squealing with excitement as he goes. He jumps off just before he gets to the marble ball at the bottom. "That was great," he says. "Come on, you try now."

Suzy still is not quite sure that this is such a good idea. "No," she says, "It looks too scary."

"No, it is not," said Johnny, and away he goes again to the top of the stairs. He climbs on and down he goes again, having just as much fun as he did the first time. He jumps off just before the marble ball at the bottom. "You gotta try this, it is the best!" urges Johnny. Well, little Suzy is not one to stay scared for very long and this really does look like fun, so she agrees. To the top of the stairs she goes. She straddles the banister rail, and slowly lets go with her hands. Down she goes, a lot faster than she expected. WHAM! Right into the marble ball at the bottom.

Little Suzy starts to cry and almost falls off the banister rail. When Johnny sees her so upset, crying ever harder and holding her groin where she collided with the marble ball, he gets a little scared that maybe she has really hurt herself.

"Maybe you had better let me see," suggests Little Johnny. So Suzy lifts her little dress and pulls down her panties. Little Johnny's face goes pale white. "OH, NO!" he shouts. "This is horrible! You knocked it right off!"