Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

[Honey Boon]

bro, think thrice .... once that "door" is open, you will be the only local left in your new flat

Originally Posted by jf66312

.........., can bring her mum over to help take care ........

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by Blast88

Hi Bro SS,

I have know my wife since 2009 & I believe we have already know & understand each other inside out. The main issues now is my business travelling, her mind tend to run wild whenever i'm oversea, always thinking that I might find women & betray her behind her back so I'm just wondering why Viet wife ia always lacking confidence on their husband?Is it their rooted nature to suspect husband whenever you are not with her

Don't be complacent my friend ....

The fact that you share a few issues so show that you and your wife are not 'there' yet .... how can it be inside out ?

I have married for a good 10 yrs and have 2 kids before I got divorced and re-married with my current wife whom we are together for close to 3 years plus and currently have a 16 mths baby ...

With my experience, i also cannot say I understand about marriage inside out ... Everything is so different comparing this marriage and my previous marrriage.

YEs, it could be their rooted nature to lack confidence or suspect their husband ... BUT it is case by case and depends on the woman ....

SOmetimes it's also the influence of friends .. anyway, there is alot of factors .. never ending ...

So if u tells me that you undertsand each other inside out. how come such situations happens ..

[Blast88]

[QUOTE=shysaint;7246007]Don't be complacent my friend ....

The fact that you share a few issues so show that you and your wife are not 'there' yet .... how can it be inside out ?

I have married for a good 10 yrs and have 2 kids before I got divorced and re-married with my current wife whom we are together for close to 3 years plus and currently have a 16 mths baby ...

With my experience, i also cannot say I understand about marriage inside out ... Everything is so different comparing this marriage and my previous marrriage.

YEs, it could be their rooted nature to lack confidence or suspect their husband ... BUT it is case by case and depends on the woman ....

SOmetimes it's also the influence of friends .. anyway, there is alot of factors .. never ending ...

So if u tells me that you undertsand each other inside out. how come such situations happens ..[/QUOTE

My situations here is not so much on understanding factor, it much more on the words 'Trust'. It the main factor in marriage life which need to be keep on cultivatiing, I admit that our 'trust' factor are still not 'there' yet, it really take time to increase the 'trust' indicator, let be honest, does bro out there believe in 100% 'trust' with your vietnamese life partner

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by Blast88

My situations here is not so much on understanding factor, it much more on the words 'Trust'. It the main factor in marriage life which need to be keep on cultivatiing, I admit that our 'trust' factor are still not 'there' yet, it really take time to increase the 'trust' indicator, let be honest, does bro out there believe in 100% 'trust' with your vietnamese life partner

Every factors are inter-link and inter-related ...

Trust is Earn ... I doubt so is by Cultivating ...

Initially ... I only trust my partner about 50% ....

Having stay with her in Vietnam , know her circle of friends , family members, her village, her lifestyle and etc .. it's up to 70%

After marriage ... 85% ... Now with baby close to 100%

But then if I don't choose to trust her 100%, meaning trust level is not there .. so how to build up the relationship further.

Then if I don't trust her 100% ... how can I ask her to trust me 100% ???

So sometimes this is the problem with we men ... we want our partner to do ABC , but then when in turn the gal ask us to do ABC, we have tons of reasons to tell them why we do not do ... hmmm .. strange

Just by talking and thinking, we won't gain trust ...

I have a friend who marry a vietnam wife .. now he is quite poor thing .. before marry so good, now after marry , everyday also quarrel .. she see yahoo messenger got girls name, she quarrel with him .. delete the contacts in front of her also no use ... what he talk to her , she dun believe, she chose to believe what her friend told her .. and becasue of the difference, they quarrel again ... headache man ...

Sometimes I feel that vietnamese gal is a very strange creature ... They are strong outside but weak inside ... they want love but dun want to tell you ... They believe you but they want to test u .. they can KPKB you BUT you cannot KPKB them ...

Troi Oi .. Troi Oi ..

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by Blast88

I have know my wife since 2009 & I believe we have already know & understand each other inside out. The main issues now is my business travelling, her mind tend to run wild whenever i'm oversea, always thinking that I might find women & betray her behind her back so I'm just wondering why Viet wife ia always lacking confidence on their husband?Is it their rooted nature to suspect husband whenever you are not with her

welcome to the VB land...VB can be very demanding and jealous...i take jealousy very positively means she loves you...never get caught with your pants down...if any better watch out...cat cu...dun think you understand Viet culture totally yet...you mentioned 3yrs...me coming to 6yrs still learning new things...hahaha...

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

...cat cu...

Yeah Yeah .. My BX always say I can go here and I can go there .. BUT then she will ...cat cu... me

[KangTuo]

Sianz.... bx LTVP application online not approve after careful consideration...
going ICA apply and appeal soon...

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by jf66312

you are not alone bro..mine older than me by a year...

oh bro,can i shake hand with u

[Golden question]

since the topic is now on trust,i would like to share an incident.That day i was suppose to meet my wife and her friend for dinner.As i was early,i went to nearby shopping mall to walk walk and cool down.suddenly i saw my wife infront so i was thinking of scare her so i walk faster.

when i was nearer,i saw her talking to a man and gesture on her handphone to him and i quickly walk behind her without her noticing.i climb up the escalator and go 2nd level to 'biao' on her from upstairs and see what she is doing.

she was talking to that man and after 3 minute,that man went off and her friend came out from the shop and they left.During dinner,i did not ask her anything cos i think i should give her own personal private c.

As long as dont cross my line,i am fine but once cross,example i saw her touch here touch there with that man that day,then bye bye for her

like what shysaint say,only u know your wife and i agreed that dont say u know your wife inside out cos everybody thinking change at different stage

So learn to know what strong point and weakness point that your wife have.

[batty]

Any bro who married a Vietnamese wife, if you left small amounts of money in your house, will your money still be there or will your wife take it? When you ask her if she had seen your money, she answered that she needed it for marketing and forgot to tell you she had taken it.

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by batty

Any bro who married a Vietnamese wife, if you left small amounts of money in your house, will your money still be there or will your wife take it? When you ask her if she had seen your money, she answered that she needed it for marketing and forgot to tell you she had taken it.

I have never encounter that before cos i always know where i put my money but i know my wife character,she is those type that if the things does not belong to her,she will not take

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by shysaint

Every factors are inter-link and inter-related ...

Trust is Earn ... I doubt so is by Cultivating ...

Initially ... I only trust my partner about 50% ....

Having stay with her in Vietnam , know her circle of friends , family members, her village, her lifestyle and etc .. it's up to 70%

After marriage ... 85% ... Now with baby close to 100%

But then if I don't choose to trust her 100%, meaning trust level is not there .. so how to build up the relationship further.

Then if I don't trust her 100% ... how can I ask her to trust me 100% ???

So sometimes this is the problem with we men ... we want our partner to do ABC , but then when in turn the gal ask us to do ABC, we have tons of reasons to tell them why we do not do ... hmmm .. strange

Just by talking and thinking, we won't gain trust ...

I have a friend who marry a vietnam wife .. now he is quite poor thing .. before marry so good, now after marry , everyday also quarrel .. she see yahoo messenger got girls name, she quarrel with him .. delete the contacts in front of her also no use ... what he talk to her , she dun believe, she chose to believe what her friend told her .. and becasue of the difference, they quarrel again ... headache man ...

Sometimes I feel that vietnamese gal is a very strange creature ... They are strong outside but weak inside ... they want love but dun want to tell you ... They believe you but they want to test u .. they can KPKB you BUT you cannot KPKB them ...

Troi Oi .. Troi Oi ..

haha,really true for this sentence but almost all gal is strange creature,u never know whats on their mind.Thats why got one chinese sentence to describe them 'female heart,deeper than sea'

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by KangTuo

Sianz.... bx LTVP application online not approve after careful consideration...
going ICA apply and appeal soon...

keep on trying bro,no choice leh,that is the 'price'for marrying a foreign spouse leh.We bro went through before but hope u will not get use to it for too long

[jf66312]

Originally Posted by KangTuo

Sianz.... bx LTVP application online not approve after careful consideration...
going ICA apply and appeal soon...

sorry to hear that...but ya, head down and appeal & at the same time see if can find out more..

good luck...

[jf66312]

Originally Posted by Honey Boon

bro, think thrice .... once that "door" is open, you will be the only local left in your new flat

yes bro... i know..am thinking carefully abt it but seems like have not much choice at the moment unless my parents are willing to help...

if not i think my oc will go khung khung soon if everyday cooped up at home alone with baby...