personal advise based on true story

[xeann]

don't start a relationship with someone you think wont work out and get yourself hurt in the end.

I met this PRC girl from work 2yr plus back, shes a pretty and chatty girl, the type of girl with a lot of male friends, she came to singapore to study since primary school and decided to stay in singapore to work while her siblings is still studying here.

As she is very chatty i talk to her alot during working hours, to know that she came from quite a rich family, her family can afford to send 4 children to study in singapore, which is not very easily for majority of the china Chinese family.

I went out with her alot of times for meals for entertainment and fall for her eventually, i even broke off with my sg gf to be together to her, even i knew that my parents will object eventually, as my family is reputable they felt that its quite tiu nian to get married to a PRC girl.

we had been together for about 2 yrs, my family still objects to it, for myself, i am quite a haolian person also, so i only tell my close friends that i have a prc girlfriend, for those whom don't know me well, or not close to me i will just tell them the girl is from singapore, as you all bros know, people will look at you quite differently if they knew that your gf is from china.

the 2 years together with her, is the happiest time of my life till now, we visited many places i even went back to china with her to show face to her parents..

things eventually worsen, and we break off. now i misses her so much. its all because of my parents objection, and myself, i just cant bring myself to tell my friends that i am seeing a prc girlfriend.

sometimes i tell myself things might be better for me this way, since i cant take the fact shes a prc, but deep down my heart i know i want this girl.

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.

piece of advice to bro out there: choose your life partner carefully.. dont end up to be someone like me hurt and helpless. cant forget her

[Feymann]

You're probably sharing the story to close up on the past chapter. It's good to let it out. Anyway,
I know how that feels bro..I have an ex whom I love but we cant be together. Her family dun really approve of me, neither does mine. We were going to settle down but eventually, she broke down first due to external pressure from family and friends. We're both single for a while now. But I cant stop thinking of her even when I'm with other girls. It hurts not to be together, so I only hope that she can find someone better than me to look after her

[Oakley76]

I think everyone comes across a relationship that really hurts us somehow.

I came to know a girl from club, loves her truly. In the end, she slept with my best friend. I forgave her and thought she would change. TO be frank, she tried hard to win my trust back.

Just recently, she pulled the same stunts again. Not answering calls, sms at certain periods of the day... Deep down, I feel she is lying though she denied she was out.. Just to share, when I contronted her abt my best fren, she knelt down and swore she was innocent (but actual fact they had a month's relationship). With that, whatever she says now seems not to be credible

Damn, why do we need to go thru all these?

[Joris]

Its the obstacles in our life and along the way we grow and learn from it as well.

[Ziek's Nick]

Ya... we learn alot along the way.
just don't do the same mistake again!

[Royster79]

Frankly speaking, whats wrong with marrying a PRC?? I dun think its that throw face. Our ancestors all came from china also.

[FrOsTy-CoLd]

Originally Posted by Oakley76

I think everyone comes across a relationship that really hurts us somehow.

I came to know a girl from club, loves her truly. In the end, she slept with my best friend. I forgave her and thought she would change. TO be frank, she tried hard to win my trust back.

Just recently, she pulled the same stunts again. Not answering calls, sms at certain periods of the day... Deep down, I feel she is lying though she denied she was out.. Just to share, when I contronted her abt my best fren, she knelt down and swore she was innocent (but actual fact they had a month's relationship). With that, whatever she says now seems not to be credible

Damn, why do we need to go thru all these?

Hi, just a thought. How about men who sleep around behind their wife or galfriends back? Women go thru all these most.

[PepperO]

Bros and Sis,

The way I see it, it's all a matter of choice. We have to bear the consequences of our decisions/actions, which may be heartbreaking at times.

But isn't life more about the journey than the destination?

I have been through difficult trials myself, but they have also helped me become the person that I am today.

Hope everyone comes out of their pain victorious.

[onlyhuman]

Originally Posted by Royster79

Frankly speaking, whats wrong with marrying a PRC?? I dun think its that throw face. Our ancestors all came from china also.

i totally agree with you...if our ancestors did not come here...we are all PRC too

[sun814]

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .

[xeann]

Originally Posted by onlyhuman

i totally agree with you...if our ancestors did not come here...we are all PRC too

true, but i guess my family is quite thinking is quite conservative, they don't really like it, now that the relationship between us had end, it might be something good for me though. i guess bros out there might have family with the same thinking as my family and understand what im talking about

[turbo_slk200]

Originally Posted by xeann

she came to singapore to study since primary school and decided to stay in singapore to work while her siblings is still studying here.

her family can afford to send 4 children to study in singapore, which is not very easily for majority of the china Chinese family.

Yo bro TS.....

I kinda feel for you... especially she is not a WL.....

Also, the points you highlighted above are further proof that there is nothing to be ashamed of. She should be able to converse well in English and fit in to sillypore society. Plus she is well-to-do, and definitely not with you for the $$$ !

You can try to explain to your parents again with the points I mentioned in this post.

Good luck !

[turbo_slk200]

Originally Posted by sun814

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

My point is that even though we should be filial to our parents who bore and raise us, but i believe happiness should be determined by our very own. If u think she is the very one that can bring happiness to u n her, just go for it. I believe our parents will bless us eventually when they see that their son is living happily .

bro sun814.... congratz on finding your happiness !!

I am sure your story is what many ppl wants to hear, especially all those playing the KC game.

[see see only]

Originally Posted by xeann

The saddest love is to love someone, to know that they still want you, but the circumstances don’t let you have them.

Young Man .... errrrr...

A gentle reminder - is year 2010 liao .............. (+ july got world cup wahaahaaahaa)

Originally Posted by sun814

If TS thinks your experience is sensational. What about mine? My wife is from prc and she is a former FL and has a daughter from her previous marriage, of course, my parents objected vigoriously as i am also from a quite a well-to-do family. my mum chased me out. they didn't attend my marriage, the wedding was only witnessed by 2 close friends and had a simple dinner with 5-6 other friends. We have been living happily together, i treat the daughter as my very own, so does she.

Bro sun814,

me salute you x 1000 times

WE choose our own path ... not others

[sun814]

thanks. indeed living happily now. the funny thing is some people thought that i am from prc too as i sometimes speak mandarin with a slang too nowadays. maybe it is because i am so used to it now. personally i think i am 新加坡人 and also 中国人 (in the broader sense, haha even though those from prc may not recognise this).