Wrong time for lecher Ah Ong to goof up as peasants buay siong Section 14 and Poodles

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Transmodified from Mouthpiece CNA hxxp://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/bukit-batok-mp-david-ong/2595896.html

PEASANTPORE: Peasant Representative(MP) for Bukit Batok SMC Lecher David Ah Ong has announced his resignation citing "horny reasons", according to a press statement from the Prime Minion's Office (PMO) on Saturday (Mar 12).

In a statement later on Saturday, lackey Ong admitted there was "personal indiscretion for his itchy dick" on his part. "KNNCCB, because of Asiatic Values Doctrine, I no choice but to resign after found to be eating outside Abalone, now to step down for the best interests of the regime and Ruler Loong," he said.

"If I in Nordic countries or even France, even I exposed got mistress, I will lauded as hero but since late Old Autocrat LKY says got Asiatic Values, now I am zero. We must act holier than white and be pious. But fark, I resign liao, this problem is now between me and wife, Jane Austen peasants, stay out of my misfortunes. I likely follow Jack Arse Neo and Media Whore Chow examples and join City Harvest"

Mouthpiece CNA has confirmed that lecherous Ong is resigning over an extramarital affair. Similar to the Palmer Affair, the vixen involved is a PAP member and grassroots volunteer, and an executive at a logistics firm. The amorous Ah Ong has been doggy farking her for about six full moons, and came to light after the vixen’s peasant hubby "cry father, cry mother" about it.

A procedural by-election will be held in Bukit Batok SMC "in due course", said Ruler Loong, who is also the reigning ruler of the Party's Against Peasants (PAP).

In the meantime, Jurong GRC Peasant Representative Desmond Lee, who is also Senior Minion of Regime for Gestapo and National Propoganda, is arrowed to take care of Bukit Batok peasants, added Ruler Loong.

Said Ruler Loong in the statement: "KNNCCB, some peasants already buay siong by The Benjamin's Affair and Smoke Grenade Incident, Opposition Pariahs sure use those two case to whack us badly .... this Ah Ong, really his cock should not be at wrong Abalone at wrong time."

FIRST PRIORITY TO MAKE SURE BUKIT BATOK WARNED ABOUT OPPOSITION PARIAHS

At a press conference after the announcement on Saturday, Deputy Prime Minion Moneybags Tarman, who is also an Peasant Representative for Jurong GRC, said the retribution was "totally unexpected".

"Following what we learned from the Nihons, amorous Ah Ong has apologised and resign, but I want to warn to Bukit Batok peasants on behalf of Ruler Loong, that they don't use this case to tell regime that want political reforms.," said Tarman. "Poodles will still continue to use Legalist Means to convict peasants and Mindef will still continue to hide behind Section 14 if their inept commanders kill peasants negligently during training. Make Ruler Loong look stupid got price to pay if you see what happen to Axis of Evil Aljunied and Hougang."

"Now got no SG50 effect, no goodies, no LKY death, but peasants better don't use this as example to show their displeasure," added Minion Desmond Lee, who was at the press conference. "Our Bukit Batok feudal lords already fanning out to warn peasants better sarpok Ruler Loong during Meet-the-Peasants sessions and conducting house visits.

"My Imperial Court colleagues in Jurong GRC will, when necessary, provide some pork barrel if necessary to ensure we got 69.9% sarpok," he added.

Jurong GRC Peasant Representative Ang Ah Neng will take over as the chairlackey of Jurong-Clementi Town Council, according to Tarman. Lackey Ah Ang said his immediate task is to ensure that the peasants of Bukit Batok, Yuhua and Jurong GRC continue to kowtow Ruler Loong's portrait 5 times daily.

At the 2015 General Election (GE), Mr Ong won Bukit Batok SMC with 73.02 per cent of the vote. Singapore Democratic Party (SDP) candidate Sadasivam Veriyah garnered 26.4 per cent of the vote, while independent candidate Samir Salim Neji got 0.6 per cent.

OPPOSITION PARIAHS RESPOND

In a news release on Saturday, the SDP said it will contest the by-election when it occurs.

"Ho Say liao, lecher David Ah Ong resignation from his post as Peasant Representative for Bukit Batok and from the regime today, I got chance liao but understand Bukit Batok got a lot of peasants who love to kowtow Ruler Loong," said SDP Sex Pattern Secretary Chee Ah Juan in a statement.

The opposition People's Power Party's (PPP) Goh Ah Seng got thick skin thinks he can win said he interested the 18k stipends when the by-election takes place.

Independent candidate Samir Ah Neh, who contested Bukit Batok SMC during GE2015, said it is "very likely" that he will stand to split votes. Mr Samir Ah Neh said he is a glutton for punishment.

Meanwhile, Pork Seller Desmond Lim said he also interested in 18k stipends.

As for the National Sex Party, it said that it is "considering splitting the votes too". Reform Party chief Kenneth Jeyaretnam also said "while peasants deserve the regime they voted for, he also want a chance to be a Peasant Representative.

Lecher ONG "WORKED HARD TO SERVE RULER LOONG'S INTEREST"

Ruler Loong said as an Peasant Representative, Ah Ong "maybe a cheap farker but is loyal to House of Lee. When Benjamin Lim died after Poodles interview him or after Mindef promoted Ah Siong, he keep quiet during Imperial Court sessions".

“By maintaining silence, he sarpok House of Lee and is deemed loyal to me,” added PM Lee.

He also said that Ah Ong loves to see old peasants work beyond retirement age and his only weakness is fondness to fark spiders outside his marriage.


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